When a boyfriend and girlfriend quarrel, how to coax each other skillfully

★ Posted on 11-19,2024



Fighting between boyfriend and girlfriend is a common problem in relationships, but how to coax each other skillfully is an art. In this article, I'll share some effective ways to resolve arguments and repair hurt feelings.

1. Calm down

When you get into an argument, the first thing to do is to calm down. Being emotional will only aggravate conflicts and make problems more complicated. Find a quiet place, take a few deep breaths, and calm yourself down.

After calming down, you can think about the reasons and triggers of the quarrel. Understanding the root of the problem can help you better understand the other person's position and find ways to resolve the issue.

2. Listen to the other party

Listening is the basis of communication. Don't interrupt or lash out when the other person is making their point. Instead, listen carefully and respect their feelings.

By listening, you can better understand the other person’s needs and expectations. At the same time, it also gives the other person the feeling of being understood and cared for. This kind of respect and care can help ease tensions and lay the foundation for repairing the relationship.

3. Express your feelings

After listening to the other person, it is your turn to express your feelings. But pay attention to approach and tone. Avoid accusations and offensive words and instead use “I” to express your feelings.

For example, you can say: "I feel sad and disappointed because I feel there is a communication problem between us." This kind of expression is more likely to be accepted and can make the other person feel better. Understand your emotions.

4. Find common ground

After you have both expressed your opinions and feelings, finding common ground is the key to resolving the argument. Find common goals or values ??between you and emphasize them.

For example, if you both want to have a stable and happy relationship, then you could say something like, "We both want our relationship to get better, so we should work together to solve problems." It can reduce opposition and hostility and increase cooperation and unity.

5. Come up with solutions

Finally, coming up with solutions is a critical step in repairing the relationship. Find a mutually acceptable solution based on your shared goals and values.

When proposing solutions, consider the other person’s needs and feelings and make compromises. This makes the other person feel valued and respected, increasing the likelihood that they will accept the solution.

6. Give time and space

Sometimes, arguments can cause both parties to become emotionally tense and need some time and space to calm down. If you sense that the other person needs some time alone or to think, give them that opportunity.

Respect the other person’s needs and give them enough time and space to show that you care about their feelings and are willing to put in the effort to repair the relationship.

7. Stick to your commitments

Finally, stick to your commitments. Whether it's changing your behavior or sticking to an agreement you made, be consistent.

By sticking to your word, you show the other person your sincerity and determination. This trust and stability can help rebuild damaged feelings and strengthen your relationship.

Fighting between boyfriend and girlfriend is a common situation, but by calming down, listening to each other, expressing your feelings, finding common ground, coming up with solutions, giving time and space, and sticking to your commitments, you can be smart Coax the other person well and repair the hurt feelings. These methods can not only help you resolve arguments, but also enhance understanding and trust between you, making your relationship stronger and happier.

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