When there is a major crisis in a marriage, it must be paid attention to in time. Don't let two people who originally loved each other torture each other because of a moment of anger, and end up with an ending in which both the relationship and the family are lost. What should you do if you encounter a marriage crisis? Here are 8 steps to quickly save your marriage. I hope it will be helpful to everyone.
1. Find out the reasons for divorce
"Men need freedom and recognition most while women need respect most. "And love and care", no matter what the reason for divorce is, these two most basic sentences cannot be separated. As a man, he should guide a woman's life and give her enough sense of security to make her feel that a real man is loving and caring for her. Women's strength and dependence and men's avoidance and cowardice make divorce unstoppable.
2. Face your partner calmly
If the other party files for divorce, it must be because he or she does not want to have close contact with you for the time being. At this time, you must control your emotions and avoid disturbing others. As we all know, if you calmly accept your partner's proposal for divorce, the other party will feel that your decision was wrong, and the possibility of remarriage in the future will be greater.
3. Put yourself in someone else’s shoes
Marriage is a matter between two people and can only last long if they work together. Since your partner is asking for divorce, it must be because you have bad habits that she cannot tolerate. If you want to save your marriage at this time, you have to think about the problem from the other person's perspective. Don't just think about your contribution in the marriage. In fact, the other party is also very dedicated to the family. Any conflicts and contradictions are based on mutual misunderstanding. How to understand each other and see the other party's contribution in the relationship is often the first step in easing the relationship.
4. Play the family card appropriately
When you find it difficult to work alone, you can consider asking your family members to Come and help. The prerequisite for family members to help is that the other person has a good relationship with your family or her family, and the other person is more concerned about the opinions of the relatives around them. At this time, you candidly explain the reasons for the divorce to them and express your determination to remarry. With the help of your family, your partner will feel the importance of the family and be more likely to return.
5. Communicate carefully
Eighty percent of conflicts between people are caused by poor communication. What you want to say is not conveyed to the other party and the other party's understanding is biased, so conflicts arise accordingly. Especially when couples live together for a long time without seeing each other in the bedroom or kitchen, communication problems are a big trouble in running a marriage.
Talk about marriage and children while both parties calm down. If you want to save your marriage quickly, you must take the initiative to admit your problems and show your willingness to work hard to improve the family relationship. You can also recall the good times in the past together to help your partner regain a warm sense of family belonging.
6. Give to each otherTime for cold treatment
If you had conflicts due to a fierce argument before breaking up, then you cannot go to the other party immediately at this time. Instead, you need to give time for everyone to calm down, which is to give the relationship a cold treatment. Because everyone will feel very angry after a heated argument. People cannot listen to anything when they are angry. Therefore, do not go to the other party at this time and do not continue to argue about who is right and wrong. This will only deepen the conflict; And don’t immediately bow your head and admit your mistake and promise the other person what to do in the future. This will only make her more rational about her decision to leave you, because the other person will subconsciously feel that it is because you did something wrong that you came to admit it. So she made the right choice to leave.
Then during the cold treatment period, you need to reflect on yourself, including the mistakes you made in this quarrel, and take the initiative to admit your mistakes to the other party. Because in any quarrel, both parties must be at fault, but if you want to save your marriage, you must first reflect on your mistakes and muster up the courage to admit them to her. Don't disturb her after the quarrel. Wait until some time has passed and both parties have calmed down before finding a suitable time. It is best to admit the mistake to her when the other party is in a good mood.
7. Arouse the resonance of the other party
Maybe when you were in a good relationship, you had different experiences. However, due to various reasons, they have not been realized one by one, so at this time you can complete one of the agreements independently. For example, go to a restaurant alone that you have wanted to go to for a long time, and then show the photos to her through the Internet display, with a paragraph: Finally here, the food is delicious, but I hope to share words with so-and-so. Later, when the other person's anger has calmed down and the conflict between the two has been resolved, you can just find another reason to meet her, and then reconcile with her naturally.
8. Think about each other’s relationship in a different way
After the breakup, we just gave each other a space and time to think about the relationship, and also had time to examine ourselves, see our own shortcomings, and change ourselves. Improve yourself, such as exercising, reading, traveling, learning the guitar and oil painting that you have always wanted to learn, etc.
Remember that in the process of constantly improving yourself, you must maintain appropriate contact with the other party, greet the other party appropriately from a distance or a distance, let the other party know your changes, and then have a good talk about what happened in the past relationship. If there are existing problems, calmly analyze the problem and then solve it. I believe that the other party will also be willing to discuss it in detail with you who are calm.
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