To be honest, when choosing someone to get married, liking is a hundred times more important than being suitable. Because only if you like someone can you have sexual desire, get married, have children, and finally grow old together. If you don't feel anything before marriage, it's rare to be in love for a long time. It may even get boring over time.
Many people are too idealistic about marriage. I feel that this person has a house, a car, and good conditions. Sooner or later, he can transition directly to family affection without love.
But in reality, most of these marriages are loveless, and the final outcome is nothing more than sharing the same bed with different dreams, and they seem to be inseparable.
To be honest, there is really no big gap between "like and suitability". In other words, most of the people you like are actually suitable for you. The so-called The inappropriateness often comes from their respective selfishness in getting along in the future.
Some people just want someone who loves them at first, then they want a hug, and then they want a kiss... As time goes by, they begin to want this person in every detail. , I want this person to have a successful career, I want this person to cook and wash dishes, I want a life that transcends classes, I want dignity, I want a sense of ceremony, I want a luxury car, I want a big house...< /p>
The so-called "inappropriate" excuses such as long-distance relationships, exes, and family disapproval are nothing more than perfunctory diplomacy. Just rhetoric. These people pretend to be very affectionate and rational,
But think about it on the other hand, "A person who is not willing to stand by your side even through small ups and downs, you are really not suitable - in fact It’s just that this person didn’t like you that much at first.”
You may think, “I take love too idealistically,” but in fact, as a psychological counselor, I am more realistic and rational than anyone else.
You think “I take love too idealistically”, but in fact, as an emotional counselor, I am more realistic and rational than anyone else.
I have also seen two people working in two places in the same city, and finally couldn't stand the distance and broke up; I have also seen two people stay together in a foreign country for five years, and finally got married.
Why are some problems such a huge and insurmountable hardship for partners? And why are some problems so difficult for other partners? To be honest, the degree of love between two people is different, so the energy given by love to each other is also different.
You can only love each other as a premise, and the two of you will gradually become suitable through constant running-in and growth. On the contrary, one or both parties do not love each other that much from the beginning, so they are not willing to be compatible in the future.Xiehe pays, no matter how big the issue is, it will become the reason why you are not suitable.
So, don’t force yourself to develop feelings with the right person. A relationship that you don't like or even feel slightly bored from the beginning will only become more and more inappropriate in the future.
What you have to do is to find the most suitable one among the people you like. Or turn the person you like the most into the most suitable person for you, and you must also become the most suitable person for the other person, so that each other's lives will be a virtuous circle.
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